Light our darkest hour...

Hoy, all! Good to be back from a long break, if only for a short post, at least for the moment. Just wanted to keep everyone updated on the Mattpocalypse.

Now that summer is here, I can discard my cover as an educator, and get to work on the more important work of updating you all on my quest to save the world from Matt Rose and his evil schemes. I can't give all the details, as Matt may be watching, but I can tell you I've got operatives all over checking on his plans. The whole crew is still on the case, from Colonel Dogpile, Senor Sloganizer, Dr. Google, and Mrs. Bablefish, to Jakerules and a new agent in disguise, Athena. She's been good enough to provide me some new leads, and I've followed up on them and some of what I've discovered will shock you.

But that's for the future. I just wanted to make sure this site was still viable, and it looks like it is. Hope to broadcast the good word this summer to you all. Stay safe and Matt-free.

The word from on high

Just spoke with Jakerules. He's given me some motiviation and inspiration for our little project here. Actually, he's given me the theme for this years efforts, and I like it...

"Matt doesn't matter."

Ah, the wisdom of it all. Of course we here at I Hate Matt Rose will continue the good fight against Matt. But I think Jakerules has given us some hope that despite what Matt does, we're going to be ok. That's the kind of positive attitude we need around here.

Thanks Jakerules!

The devil is in the details

By devil, I mean Matt, of course.

This is a minor post, but I like to think of it showing that Matt has his grubby paws in all things large and small.

Yesterday, in my disguise as an educational worker, I had to escort a group of students to a competition. After we returned, I found out that I had a bunch of paperwork to complete by Monday. So there I say, working for three hours on this stuff, instead of enjoying the freedom that is my normal Saturday.

I'd like to think that Matt had something to do with all this. He's involved, I can just feel it. He's slowing down my crusade to stop all of his viscious plans. And he's making life boring for me, to boot.

Grrrr.

Deep in the Belly of Evil

And boy does it stink.

I've been gone, I'll admit. Things come up, as they often do. But never, never did my hate for all things Matt Rose falter. It's kinda like even when you are sleeping, your heart keeps beating. So, too, does I Hate Matt Rose.

I've had to delve deep into my cover as an educator for these past few months. And I had to make it look convincing, so that's been taking most of my energy and time. Now is not a great time of the year either, but I had some time, so I thought I'd update you how everything goes.

Also, in order to further throw off the scent of predator/prey, I've been spending some time with the ol' Evil One himself. That's right, I've hung out with Matt Rose.

The horror.

Oh, on the outside, it's been all "giggles" and "laughs". I've hung out with him playing "games" and watching "movies". An unenlightened observer might even say that we'd been having a good "time". But it's all just for show. Just so that I could get closer to Matt, and discover more of his evil plans.

And what I've learned will shock and awe you. I'll post a few of my more amazing discoveries in an odd fashion. I'll post them as they should have taken place. So, if you will look back at Nov to Jan, you'll find them. Even tho I'm posting them now, you can be assured that they indeed did take place at or about the times I will post them at. My cover didn't allow me at the time to come forth with them, but now I feel like I can break my silence and show forth the glorious, hideous truth.

Let the truth be known.

Swelling Ranks

On a more positive note, as you can see from an earlier post, Jakerules has successfully made contact with our organization. This is a great victory for us! It took a while to verify that it was actually Jakerules, but after a face to fact meeting, everything got sorted out.

It's good to have him aboard. There were some pretty dark night there in late summer. Wondering if it really was me, alone, vs. the world-spanning evil that is Matt? Well, now that Jakerules, Thee Virgil Gallegher, and company are on board, I'm feeling better. I've got a new renewed sense of purpose. Matt, you had me down, but not out. You should have finished me when you had the chance.

Now it's my turn.

Ice is back with a brand new attack

Hey all, I know you've all been wondering what's been going on. Am I alive? How is Matt's plan to dominate the world coming? Is Mrs. Babelfish single yet?

I'll get to that last one in a moment.

With summer over, I must once again resume my cover of being a lowly public school employee. People start to ask too many questions if you just sit around all day trying to figure out what Matt is doing to screw up the world. So I maintain this cover of working at a school. Besides, it gives me weekends and summers off. And occasionally pays the bills.

Why bother with having a cover when the world could suffer Rosageddon at any moment? Well, it's all about keeping the heat off you. For example. Batman didn't work at all, what with his playboy image, and I think that's why so many people were after him. If he'd held down a steady job, people wouldn't have given him a second thought. But since he gave the image of having time to spare, people were always kidnapping him, or Robin, or Alfred, or his jewels...the list goes on and on.

Those who don't know the past are doomed to repeat it.

So what has Matt been up to lately? Well, it's not good. He's managed to fool some folks in pretty high places, and now he's working at the corporate office of a major United States company. I've seen this from him before. First, get into a companies good graces by starting from an entry level position. Then slowly get promoted, gain people's trust, and then finally stab them in the back once he's in a position of power.

He's got the time to make this scheme work. He does appear to impervious to aging. See that post about him and the Civil War, if you don't recall.

It's diabolical, but my crack team of associates and I are powerless to stop him right now. You see, Matt has timed his latest takeover move to correspond with some other schemes of his that have been brewing for a long time. Oh, it was clever, I'll give him credit for that. More on those other schemes in the coming days. Just what those schemes are will shock you to your soul. It's amazing what Matt is capable of.

And on a sad note, yes, it does appear that Mrs. Babelfish's marriage is on the rocks. You'll notice she hasn't had much to do with the site recently. I've been giving her time to try and work through her issues with Mr. Babelfish. But things just don't seem to be working out.

I'll share this, because I know I can trust all of you out there. At the recent I Hate Matt Rose staff party, she and Señor Sloganizer did end up spending most of their time together. I think it was a natural thing, since no one else around here has any idea what the good Señor is saying. They do seem happy with each other, I'll give them that. I'll try to get some photos of that gala event posted in the near future.

Well, it's good to be back and spreading the word of I Hate Matt Rose. I'll broadcast again soon from my secret location.

Where The Monsters Are

Well, wish me luck. Jakerules called me up and invited me over to his place for a visit. I'm still not sure if this is the real Jakerules, or an elaborate plan by Matt to get me on his turf. Well, I'll find out soon enough.

I just want you all to know that, if this is a trap, these last few weeks of struggling against Matt have been the happiest of my life. If I don't come back, please keep up the good fight!

Good luck to you all. I'm going in...

Makeup Trailer Matty

It leaves a bad taste in my mouth, all the things Matt has ruined for me. I'm dead on the inside, and it's his fault.

Here's what I'm talking about. Thanks to Colonel Dogpile and His Excellency Sir IMDB.com, I've learned Matt has been working on makeup crews for several famous Hollywood movies. Movies I've loved over the years. Now, all turned to dust.

I mean, check out this list of films:

Planet of the Apes
Hellboy
Batman and Robin
The Rocketeer
Coming to America
Beauty and the Beast
Predator
Aliens

The list goes on, but not my heart. I'm all torn up. All the good times we've shared, gone forever. Heck, I just watched "Aliens" with Matt not too long ago. Now I see why...it was just another way for him to brag about how good he is.

What really makes me sick is that he's worked on children's films like "Beauty and the Beast". I know we follow the almighty dollar around here sometimes. But think of the children, for goodness sake. The line must be drawn somewhere.

I'm calling you out, Matt.

So Much Shouting

Ah, that crazy Matt, he sure has been busy. I've got a page full of things he has done, and I don't know where to begin. I'll have to ration them out over the next weeks. Course, what nefarious plans will Matt have hatched by then? Who knows what evil this man is capable of??

That would be me.

I've seen his latest scheme, and it's low. Real low. Matt has introduced...Blog spam.

And you thought that regular spam was bad. What's with that jelly-like substance anyway? I digress.

As I was reading thru old posts, checking for mistakes or what have you, something new caught my eye. On one of my posts I noticed I had "7 comments". Wahoo!, I thought. Someone was reading the site and decided to post some thoughts of their own. Awsome! Great! Fantastic!

Imagine my shock (and awe) when I discovered that the comments were only formulaic responses telling me I had a great site, and oh-by-the-way why don't I visit some website for all my gardening needs. Or Erectile Disfunction needs. Or porn needs.

It was then that I realized that Matt must be behind all of this. He knows were growing a bit too strong here at I Hate Matt Rose, but he doesn't want to tip his hand. So what's left to do but to spam us. Dirty. Disgusting. Totally in line with what I expect from him.

I had hoped that it wouldn't reach this level of confrontation between us. I hoped we could wage our dirty little war in the shadows. You know, so it wouldn't have to spill out on to regular, decent folk. I was wrong. Matt has pulled off the kid gloves.

But I've got some gloves of my own to remove. I'm going to subscribe him to some home and garden magazines. Two can play this game.

El hombre con la botella en su mano

Another recruit for I Hate Matt Rose. We're really growing by leaps and bounds here. I think I may need to look at renting some office space. (On an aside, I'm working on a project with Director of Technical Affairs Gallegher to arange for a group photo of everyone working on I Hate Matt Rose. Look for a group shot in the coming days.)

I was looking for something to spruce up the site. You know, give it a bit of pizzaz. Some street cred, if you will. What I found was a true brother in the war that's coming.

It was Mrs. Babelfish that initially pointed me in his direction. Or some people on the Warmachine forums. Doesn't matter.

When I went to meet him, he was sitting by a dusty roadside cafe in Ciudad Sola, Mexico. When I told him why I was there, he squinted up at me and in a parched voice said "Para una botella de tequilla y un paquete de fuma, yo son su hombre." What a connection I felt! My Spanish isn't too good, but I'm pretty sure he is filled with loathing for Matt Rose. I can't express how good it felt to find a kindred spirit.

Anyway, Señor Sloganizer will be spouting random sayings for us at the top of the page. They'll change every once in a while...he's so creative. Gracias, Señor!

MatT-100

As I was doing a bit of work on the website, I looked at the last post and I realized something. Maybe, just maybe, it wasn't Jakerules that I was talking to on the phone at all. Check this out.

You remember the movie, "The Terminator"? There's this one scene where Linda Hamilton is talking on the phone to her grandmother. She's telling her everythings all right, not too worry. Then you see who is on the other side of the conversation. Yep. The Terminator. It's not Linda's grandmother at all. It's the Terminator. Only it sounds like Linda's grandmother. I know! I'm like, "Holy crap, that's the Terminator, but it sounds like Linda's grandmother!" Or at least what I imagine her grandmother sounds like. Heck, it fooled Linda, so it must be pretty convincing.

So maybe, just maybe, that's the dealio here. "Jakerules" calls me up. Says he's having some trouble posting to the website. Says not to worry. Everything will be fine. Right, grandma...

Who can you trust?

Plus, this just feeds into my theory that Matt has incredible powers. The ability to mimic a person's voice must seem like child's play to someone like Matt. But it would fool us mortals for sure.

Or, perhaps he's really a time traveller from the future sent back in time to hunt down Linda Hamilton. I'm not really sure about that last bit, tho.

By the way, some of the information for this post was provided by Sir Imdb.com. Thanks for helping out, your Excellency.

Matt at it again

I've spoken with Jakerules and everything is ok. You thought that Matt had gotten to him, too? Yeah, I was worried there for a bit. Turns out things are well, and he was just having a few problems that hopefully will be cleared up soon. We'll all laugh about it soon. I think Jake even has gotten another post idea out of the whole situation.

Stay strong, brothers and sisters!